Dean and Cas Winchester
by AzarathianSorceror
Summary: What happens when Dean and Cas take to the suburbs, with 7 small children in tow?
1. Beginnings

**This is a story based on a conversation two friends had that I happened to come across. I would like to link to the art and conversation here: .com/art/SPN-Dean-and-Cass-plus-7-179748895 . They were kind enough to lend their ideas to me. Thanks Invisibleheros and Onlyobsessive

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Bobby has lent the boys and their… company his place while he spends some time with Crowley in the Bahamas. After a few days of pranking each other, steamy late night sessions between both parties, and just general house wreckage, they get bored.

So Sam and Gabriel go out for the day. Dean doesn't want to know where they are or what they are up to, but it does give him an opportunity to be alone with _his_ angel.

"Cas? What the hell are you doing?"

"I wished to present you with a surprise… I don't think it went right, however."

"Went right? Cas, the kitchen is covered with sugar, and is that butter on your face?"

"It seems the mixer was more powerful than I had previously anticipated."

"The mixer was more pow… Wait, were you cooking for me?"

"Sam said you liked pie, so I found a recipe that seemed acceptable. I was about to … cream the butter and sugar with an electric beater. The outcome is evidently less than desirable. I apologise, Dean."

Dean looked softly into the downtrodden angel's eyes. It seemed no matter how high he built his 'macho man defences' Cas' natural puppy eye look could break them down as efficiently as Sam's trained look.

"C'mere Cas."

"Yes, Dean."

Dean pulled the angel closer and wrapped his muscular arms around him. Cas tightened the embrace and pushed his slightly chapped lips against the hunter's trained pair.

"Forgive me?"

"Was never angry."

Dean playfully licked the butter off his relieved partner's face, and was very pleased with the highly unholy noise that elicited out of the darker haired man's mouth.

"Perhaps we had better leave the kitchen."

Cas smiles and begins to lead Dean towards the couch. He pulls himself up towards the plump and slightly bruised lips once again and suckles slowly on the bottom lip. Dean moans in a way that makes Cas' cock harden. Dean's hands roam from his lover's head, over milky, firm skin, down towards his ass, which he grips with sudden fervour. Bucking his hips wildly, Cas bites with sudden determination on his hunter's neck, after which he soothes the skin with his soft and skilled tongue. He then ghosts over Dean's torso, down to his hips, removes the boxers covering the obvious hard-on that Cas had caused Dean. With one deft move Cas swallowed the entire length with swift precision and skill, obviously used to this. Dean's moans filled the room, and the temperature rose by a few degrees every time the two men touched each other.

Dean crawled away from Cas' grasp, and reversed positions with his angel. Now covering him with his body, he pulls Cas' hips closer to him before capturing those plump lips yet again. Their tongues battled for dominance and Dean won. Using this to his advantage he explored the cavern of Cas' mouth with expertise.

Suddenly, he realised something was very wrong. The perfect creation writhing below him was wearing far too many clothes. Pulling the white shirt off his head, Dean swiftly moved down to the nipples that were now pebbled in arousal. Licking, suckling, biting, anything and everything to make his lover feel over the edge.

"Dean, You… ungh… Cock… Now."

Dean smirked, before reaching slowly down and teasingly removing the trousers covering his lover's raging hard on. Cas, however, was getting impatient. Which was evident when both of their remaining clothing vanished with a simple click.

"Whoa, easy tiger. That's unfair."

"Fill me before I send you to the Bahamas with Crowley."

Hearing this Dean hastily pulled some lube out of the drawer next to the couch. He went to stretch Cas, when he shook his head.

"That's already been taken care of, Dean."

Dean chuckled. He smeared the lubricant onto his own member, before pushing into his dark haired angel. The moans could be heard throughout the hotel as they pushed and thrust together. Working up a rhythm, Dean soon found Cas' prostate. Everything went white as Cas spasmed around Dean's length. A few more thrusts and Cas came with a scream laced with his true voice. Dean was soon to follow, and they curled up next to each other in pure bliss.

After a few minutes Dean spoke.

"You're getting better and better at this, Cas. You must have a good teacher."

"I do not understand, Dean. I learnt how to fornicate while giving you high amounts of pleasure, as you do to me. I have only ever copulated with you, so that statement insinuates that I learnt from you, as you are the only person I have ever… oh. Vanity is a sin, Dean."

"But where would I be without my charming arrogance?"

Cas just gave him a quizzical look, when a stork flew in the hotel window, and dropped a small baby girl into Dean's hands.

"Here is your child. Treat her well," said the stork as he swivelled around to Dean, who had a rather comical look on his face. You could say it was a cross between surprise, fear, and protectiveness.

"Dude, I think you've made a mistake…"

"Even if I had, which I haven't, she needs a home. You'll do fine."

The stork flew out the window with a mere shrug once it had certified that they were the appropriate parents.

"What the hell! How did we get a kid?"

"Isn't it obvious, Dean? We didn't use protection."

Dean's jaw dropped in surprise, but before he could intervene Cas spoke, with a pleading undertone and those puppy eyes that we mentioned earlier.

"Dean, can we please keep her?"

"Cas. Do you think we're ready for the responsibility of a baby?"

"_Please_ Dean?"

Dean sighed. How could he hold out? It was, after all, his daughter.

"Cas, if it'll make you happy, then I suppose so. But we can't keep hunting if that's the case, ok?"

"Yay! Thankyou Dean. We shall name her Gabriella, after my brother."

"No way in hell am I naming a poor innocent baby after HIM!"

"Well thanks for that!"

Dean, startled, turned towards Gabriel and Sam, who had appeared a few moments beforehand.

"Thanks for the kind offer, little bro, but I don't think _mommy_ would like it very much."

"IF ANYONE'S THE MOTHER IT'S CAS!"

"I don't understand why you are so upset at such a compliment. After all, you raised Sam with a mothers unconditional love."

"I… ahh… I was being a good big brother. Not father, not… mother…"

"It does not seem to be similar with other brothers. I would have to say the closest comparison would be maternal."

"You hear that Sammy! Dean-o's your mom!"

"Gabe, can we just let the two squabble about the baby, get the lube and go."

"Sorry kiddo, I forgot about that. Hold on a moment."

Gabriel flicked his wrist and the lube flew off the bedside table. Before he left with Sam, though, he formed a cherry and gave it to the temporarily un-named baby to play with.

"With parents like that, your life is going to be interesting… and filled with brothers and sisters pretty quickly. If you ever need help, just call for Uncle Gabe."

With that they materialised out of the hotel room and Cas went to remove the cherry from his child's mouth before she choked. He was shocked, however, when she seemed to have taken to the cherry and was looking at it with her big, blue eyes.

"Dean, what about Cherry?"

"Huh?"

"Cherry. She appears to like the food, and you could relate it to the pie, so it would be feasible to bestow upon her that particular name."

"Yeah… Cherry. Cherry Winchester, unless you have a last name."

"I do, but it is unpronounceable to the human tongue. Cherry Winchester is pleasant."

And that is how the first of the children of Dean and Cas came to be. She is probably the best behaved of all, and has bright blue eyes like Daddy Cas, and dirty blonde hair like Daddy Dean.

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**I thank the gods it's done! First chapter's up! Woot! Hope to have the next one up soon.**


	2. A New Home A New Life

**So here it is. Chapter 2. Hope you like it. Again I link to InvisibleHeros and OnlyObsessive. www . deviantart . com. / art / SPN - Dean - and - Cass - plus - 7 - 179748895. Remove the spaces. Because I forgot in the last chapter, here is the disclaimer.**

**SPN DOES NOT BELONG TO ME. DEAN DOES NOT BELONG TO ME. CAS DOES NOT BELONG TO ME. THEIR KIDS DO NOT BELONG TO ME. ALL THIS BELONGS TO ERIC KRIPKE, INVISIBLEHEROS, AND ONLYOBSESSIVE.**

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"So are you sure that's everything, Dean?"

"Yeah Sammy. I think so. The truck's all loaded."

"See you in suburbia."

Dean steps into the moving-van and drives towards the house that Cas, oblivious to human procedure, made appear in a vacant lot in a small community town. They had spent 5 hours explaining to neighbours that it was a new company building houses in different locations and once it was perfect for the people living there, they would move it to the desired then move it when it was up to specification.

When he pulled up at his new home, Cas was waiting for him. He greeted him with a firm, passionate kiss upon his lips. A few of their new neighbours stared for a bit, before getting back to work. It was evident they were not used to this. This just made Dean get much more intimate on the front lawn. Slipping his tongue inside his angel's mouth, he caressed the interior and a rough, calloused hand slid around a trench coat, under a white business shirt and up the pale, sensitive skin of his lover's back.

"Dean, the neighbours are staring…"

"Let them stare, Cas. I want to let each and every one of them know who this beautiful creature belongs to."

Cas moans at this. Dad, he loved this man. This, insatiable, bull-headed, idiotic, charming human. It was easy to understand why various angels fell. It allowed for love. The ability to care for this inquisitive human race. He would never have been allowed this in heaven before the new management came in. He was going to have to work there for a bit, however, to pay off his debt for the house. Dean would not be happy when he found out.

"Dean, I think we should go shopping. If I'm correct then the stork will arrive again shortly."

"Huh?"

"Last night. We didn't use protection then either."

"Cas, that's not how babies arrive. Cherry was just a fluke."

"You should never tell your child that they were a mistake, Dean. Apologise to Cherry."

"Cas, that's not what I meant."

"Apologise."

Dean sighed. This whole stork thing was a bit much for him at the moment, and now he had to say sorry to his newfound 2 month old daughter.

"I'm sorry, Cherry. Daddy Dean loves you."

"Thankyou, Dean."

Sam strolled up to help his brother move the rest of the stuff into the house while Cas and Gabriel talked.

"So, little brother. You excited? I can tell your neighbours are a bit apprehensive."

"Why would that be?"

"Could it have something to do with Dean-o molesting you in front of their eyes?"

"Oh."

"Which reminds me. The stork's coming soon again. Cher is only 2 months old. You guys are moving fast."

Cas looked up for the tell-tale signs of a stork arrival. The sweet scent in the air was most definitely there, as was the sunbeams shining on their soon-to-be bedroom window. He would be here in a matter of hours. The two of them had to go shopping immediately.

"Cas? Cherry's upset. Can you help me out, babe?"

Shaken out of his reverie, Cas glanced at his beautiful hunter before taking their hiccupping daughter out of his arms.

"Dean. We need to go shopping now."

Within a blink they were at the store, armed with a trolley, baby carrier, which was strapped to Dean (to his annoyance), and their cooing baby. Seems the trip had done her good.

"We need baby formula, and extra blankets, and another cot, and…"

"Slow down, Cas. We have plenty of formula, and blankets, and why would we need another cot?"

"We were very careful for the most part when Cherry came along. We always used condoms, but last night, before the move, we forgot. Now the stork is coming again. Soon. So hurry, Dean. He'll be here within the hour."

"Stork… Protection… Last night… Baby… WE'RE HAVING ANOTHER ONE!"

"No need to shout, Dean. Now help me with the choices. Will it be a boy or a girl? What do you think? We'll go neutral. Get the yellow one. Oh, and no credit card fraud anymore. I… um… I'm working in heaven to pay off the grace debt for the house, and they said if I do well they'll get us some money to use as well. Now, nappies. Where would they be?"

"YOU'RE WORKING WITH THEM AGAIN! But… Then I'll be the stay at home mom. You can't leave! I'm the dad! You're the mom."

Cas stared at Dean for another moment before he pulled a baby bottle off the shelf. Speaking more to himself than to Dean, he breathed out cautiously.

"It isn't exactly my choice."

By now they were at the checkout. Cas was a fast shopper. He removed Dean's vocal cords before he could say anything at that loud volume again. He paid and flew them back to the house in a moment. Replacing Dean's organ, he allowed him to voice his anger at last.

"THOSE DICKS WITH WINGS ARE FORCING YOU TO WORK FOR THEM! I'LL MOLOTOV THEM WITH HOLY FIRE AND WATCH THEM BURN!"

"Dean, please. It is simple enough, and we want heaven on our side when we are in a situation such as this."

"Yeah, Dean. Fighting monsters, killing me, starting and stopping the apocalypse is nothing compared to raising kids."

"Who asked you, Gabriel? You're next on my list of things to douse in holy oil and set alight."

"Dean, would you just sit down and relax?"

"WILL ALL YA IDJITS SHUT UP!"

They turned to see Bobby standing in the doorway, with a look of disapproval on his face. Crowley soon followed, and as everyone got over the shock of seeing them both, they came in and sat down on the yet-to-be-put-in-a-specific-place couch.

"We came to wish you all good luck, what with you being neighbours and all."

"What? No, Bobby. Dean and Cas are the only ones who are in the suburbs."

"Well, Sam. Gabriel tells a different story."

"Gabe? What does he mean?"

"Sammy, I… meant it to be a surprise. You sounded so happy for Dean and getting out of a hunters life. Living with what normality he can when he's dating an angel. I wanted to give you the same."

"Awww, Gabe. That's so sweet. Thanks. Where do we live?"

"We live a few streets over. Not to far, but far enough that we don't have to hear these 2 during the night…"

Dean choked and Cas had to give him an angel rendition of the Heimlich manoeuvre. After the situation was abated, they heard a small voice clearing its throat. They turned to see that the stork had arrived, with one, no… two small bundles.

"Twins!"

"TWINS!"

"Twins?"

The various exclamations were heard throughout the house. Cas was, of course, overjoyed at the small bundles and immediately decided to fit in with the naming pattern. Pie themed names was all the rage, in his mind.

"The boy shall be Boston Cream, and the girl, Apple Rhubarb. For short, Boston and Apple. Is that alright, Dean?... Dean?"

"We have… twins… and a 2 month old baby…"

"DEAN!"

"Yeah, Cas. Boston and Apple Winchester. That's fine with me."

Boston started to whine, wanting a cuddle from his Daddy Cas, while Apple was happily sucking on her left foot.

"Guess this is our cue to leave, huh Sammy?"

"Sure, Gabe. Why don't we break in that new house of ours?"

Dean had a sudden realisation at this snippet of conversation. Why wasn't his brother receiving bundles of babies? It didn't work. No, scratch that. NONE of this should work. No storks, no babies, no suburbia, no shopping for baby formula, none of it.

"It's simple, Dean-o. We're careful."

"Don't read my thoughts!"

"It's hard not to when you're practically screaming them at me!"

"Gabe, let's go already."

They vanished with a click, and Dean finally had a chance to look at the latest additions to his family. They looked similar. Jet black hair for Boston, and blue-black hair for Apple. They had his emerald green eyes, but they gave Daddy Cas' stare. Boston whinged yet again, this time for his Daddy Dean. He lifted him up and held him close. He hadn't felt so protective of anything since Sam was a kid, and now he had 3 of his own. This was… right. He could feel it.

"Cas?"

"Yes Dean?"

"I love you."

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**Awww. Dean's coming to terms with his sudden parenting responsibilities. Next chapter soon. Reviews are awesome and inspirational.**


	3. Two New Arrivals

**Here it is. The latest instalment. **

**THEY STILL DON'T BELONG TO ME! WHY? I'M A GOOD GIRL, SANTA!**

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Sour Cream Raisin arrived when his condom broke. Lo and behold, there was a stork there with a pink bundle the next morning. Cas ran, and immediately named his latest child.

"Cas, it almost seems like you knew another kid would arrive."

"Of course not, Dean. 4 children will suffice."

"So no more children from here on out?"

"None."

Reese turned up when "_Uncle Gabe"_ declared he wanted more nephews.

"I mean, seriously! You've got 3 daughters, but only one son! As much as I love them all, you need another boy. SO GET TO IT!"

"I won't be told what to do by you, Gabriel."

"You mean you won't be told WHO do to."

"Cas! Get your idiotic brother out of our house now!"

"This goes in the book."

"What book?"

"The book I started containing all the female tendencies you have. This is number 251 on the contents list."

"HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO PROVE I'M A GUY?"

Cas walked down the staircase, holding the hand of his oldest daughter who was curled up against him. With a glance at the two men, he assessed the situation, and came up with an ideal solution to his troubles.

"You don't have to prove it to me, Dean. Gabriel, would you mind taking Cherry for a walk? She's a bit fidgety."

"No problem, lil bro."

With a smirk and a click Gabriel was gone, with his eldest niece in tow. As they neared the park, he started to think about his opportunities to im-stork-nate his second favourite couple with a new baby boy.

"Whadda ya think, Cher? Is your Uncle Gabe going to go through with his plan? Should I?"

Cherry just gurgled happily in her pusher. She was 10 months old now, and a little angel – no pun intended. Her hair was growing and she looked positively beautiful. Her gurgling was taken as affirmation. Gabriel clicked his fingers again, and laughed contentedly to himself again. He'll have another nephew in no time.

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"Cas? Cas! Where are you? The dishwasher's busted and it's flooding the kitchen."

"Come upstairs, Dean"

"Upstairs? Can you fix the dishwasher first?"

"Get up here, now!"

"Jesus, Cas. You don't have to yell."

"Hurry, Dean, unless you would rather spend time with Zachariah."

Dean practically bolted up the flight of stairs. Searching the upper story, he found his angel in the bedroom, spread out, naked, for his eyes to behold.

"Dean, I am overcome with an incomparable feeling of lust towards you. I need you, bent over and taking me inside your tight, dry heat RIGHT NOW."

"Wow, Cas. Who knew you could dirty talk?"

"Strip. Now. Or do you want me to remove your clothes by force?"

Within a matter of minutes Dean was naked, breathing heavily, and under complete submission to his angel and, for the moment, master.

"Holy fuck, Cas. Fill me. I can't take any more teasing."

"Then I won't make you wait."

Dean's puckered hole was well prepared by now, and he was practically crying from the pain of an unauthorised release. He knew he was going to cum soon. Cas was that fucking brilliant. He'd have to do this dominant thing more often, and he could see why his lover enjoyed it so much. Fisting the sheets, he mentally prepared himself for the swift penetration that he knew was coming. Feeling Cas' cock brushing lightly around his entrance was almost too much. Before he knew what he was doing he had guided the stiff organ towards him, and was finally allowed to feel his lover inside him.

"Castiel. You motherfucker. Why didn't you do this to me sooner?"

"Patience, beautiful. The best is yet to come."

With these words Cas started to rock in and out of his hunter's tight body. This was indeed highly pleasurable. He would have to do this again, but for now, he had to concentrate on his pretty human writhing beneath him as he hit his prostate over and over again. Dean couldn't even speak coherently. All that came out was "Fuck" and "Cas" and "Yes". Everything else was mewls and grunts of pleasure. His body was in sensory overload. Cas was picking up the pace, as they are both so very close to the ultimate climax. Skin against skin, slick with sweat and saliva. The scent alone was perfect. The smell of the two men mingling to create the highest of aphrodisiac environments. Dean inhaled deeply before he knew he was spent, and came, staining their bodies with the white fluid.

"FUCK CAS!"

The spasm of Dean's muscles around him caused Cas to cum as well. The movement milking him dry. Collapsing in exhaustion from the act, he curled around Dean and wrapped his silky blue black wings around them, and slept, for the first time in ages, in complete bliss.

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"Do you think they're done, Cher?"

"Uh-Huh!"

"Can we take you home now?"

"Yup!"

"Then we'd better go then, hadn't we?"

Gabriel heard the post-coital snoring. Being the trickster he is, he decided a proper wake up was in order. He sat down and thought for a few moments before acting. He wanted this to be perfect, of course, and without his sasquatchian lover nearby, his resources were unlimited.

"That's it! Cherry? Your brother and sisters are in the playroom, right?"

"Uh-Huh."

"Hold on a moment."

"Okey, Uncle Gabe."

Within a heartbeat Gabriel had disappeared and returned with the rest of the children. Seating them in a circle, he explained to them what they had to do.

"So you kids remember what I taught you, right? I want you to show Daddy Dean and Daddy Cas those tricks, ok? And make sure you do them really loud!"

So the 4 small babies toddled, crawled and carried themselves up the stairs, into their parent's room, flew onto the bed and then…

"EAR PEIRCING SCREECH!"

"AAAAAAHHHHHH!"

"Dean, our children are singing to us! Isn't it lovely?"

Dean, picking himself up off the floor, covered himself and hushed his children before they broke the entire neighbourhood's eardrums. Once that was accomplished, he attempted to do the same.

"GABRIEL!"

Snickering to himself, he clicked into the very crowded room… with a stork on his arm, holding a small, blue bundle in its beak.

"I answered the door. It's for you, Dean-o."

So now the family consisted of:

Daddy Dean – Human

Daddy Cas – Angel

Cherry – Half Angel

Boston – Half Angel

Apple – Half Angel

Sour Cream – Half Angel

AND

Reese – Half Angel

Of course, the pie-themed name was Cas' choice, as Dean was still recovering from the hymn his children had sung him.

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**This took an awful lot of motivation. Ungh. Tired. Reviews are my caffeine! **


	4. A Cupful Of Sugar

**No new kids this chapter, but there is a nosy neighbour! What suburbian town is complete without one?**

**STILL NOT MINE - ALTHOUGH I AM WORKING ON IT *HOLDS KNIFE TO KRIPKE'S THROAT***

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"Cas, hon, can you get that?"

Cas materialised in front of the door and opened it, curious as to who would knock on the door to his house. Gabriel would just appear in the lounge room, accompanied with a candy bar; Sam would normally just walk in and announce his presence. Crowley would enter with the same courtesy as the archangel, and Bobby would just yell before entering the house. Nobody knocked in this family, so who could it be?

"I'm Mrs. Thripstick. I live across the road, and I was wondering if I could please inconvenience you for a cup of sugar?"

"Of course, Gertrude, but that's not what you're really here for, is it?"

"How do you know my name? And what do you mean by that comment?"

Hearing the unusual conversation downstairs, Dean rushed to intervene before she called the cops on them.

"That's my Cas, a bit of a psychic, if you know what I mean. He knew all the neighbours names before we had lived here for a week! Sorry if he startled you."

Temporarily overwhelmed by the sheer beauty of the two men in front of her, Gertrude Thripstick just nodded dumbly.

"I'll get you that cup of sugar. Please, sit down. Make yourself at home. Cas, can you help me out for a second?"

"But Dean, I…"

"Now, hon."

Dragging Cas into the kitchen, Dean explained the situation.

"Cas, she's snooping. She wants to know more about us. The cup of sugar is just an excuse to come in our house."

"Why would anyone want to know more about us, Dean?"

"If a house appears in your neighbourhood overnight, and two _very _sexy men turn up to live in it, with their 5 pie-named children, who suddenly start singing in enochian with little angel voices, breaking your windows, wouldn't you be curious?"

"Not really, Dean."

"I give up!"

Hearing their kids coming out of the playroom, Dean suddenly feared the worst.

_My kids are the most fantastic thing in the universe, and Uriel, having recently been raised from death, has no trouble reminding me of it. Damn Uriel! How did he become my lover's boss? I swear he's sleeping his way up in the ranks. Zachariah has made a pass at me more than a few times. Focus! You need to stop your kids before they do something angelic. That was the weirdest sentence I've ever thought… Hurry! Before…_

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"I'm sorry, honey. Can you repeat that?"

"We're sorry our singing broke all the windows… We were just doing what Uncle Gabe told us too. Daddy Dean fell out of bed! It was so funny, wasn't it guys?"

"Are you talking about that incident about 4 months back where all the windows on the street were smashed?"

"Yeah. We're really, really sorry."

"What's your name, sweetheart?"

"Cherry! And that's Boston, and that's Apple, and that's Sour Cream, and that's Reese."

"Those are… lovely… names."

"Daddy Dean loves pie, so Daddy Cas named us after them. I'm the oldest!"

"How old are you, dear?"

"I'm 1 and 2 months! Boston and Apple are twins. They're 1. Sour Cream is 6 months. Reese is 4 months."

"You are very good at talking for someone so young."

"Uncle Gabe and Uncle Sammy taught us. We know lots of things. Did you know that meadowsweet is very very very dangerous? It will make a pagan god eat you all up! Uncle Sammy's real smart, and Uncle Gabe is funny. He helped us draw this picture!"

Reese handed his oldest sister the picture of an angel banishing sigil. It was drawn in blood. Gertrude looked a bit shocked when she realised this. Looking nervously around the room, her eyes caught on a gun in an inconspicuous corner. Surrounding it was salt packed into bullets, knives, and all other dangerous weaponry. Swallowing a gulp. she turned back to the child in front of her.

"Uncle Gabe said we can't touch the picture in the middle, or else Daddy Cas, Uncle Gabe, and all of us would go far away. But he said it's important to have with us if anyone comes and tries to get us. I won't let anyone come near my brothers and sisters!"

"About that Uncle Sammy of yours, what's he like? Is he a good uncle?"

"He's great! He's super-duper smart! He's teaching us Latin!"

"Yeah, Uncle Sammy's smart, isn't he?"

"DADDY DEAN! The nice lady was talking to us, and we were saying sorry for the windows."

"That's very nice of you, kids. Do you want to help Daddy Cas? I think he has a few lollipops for you..."

Within a flash, a literal flash, they were gone.

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"Were they disturbing you? I'm so sorry if they were."

"No, they weren't. You're, Dean, right? Your daughter is a very good speaker. What else did Uncle Sammy teach them? I'd love to pass it on to my daughter. She's got a new baby on the way, and she wants to give him the best start intellectually she can."

"My brother just… well… my kids are special and he just played on their strengths. Cherry was always a fast learner. Sam didn't have to teach her much. I'm more worried about his boyfriend's influence on our kids. Gabriel is Cas' brother, and Sam's lover. It's complex, but we manage. He's the one you have to be careful of. But as I was saying, Cherry was always one step ahead of other children, and the rest of our kids just followed her lead."

"As I soon learned to with you, Dean."

"Hey Cas."

Cas had noticed the older woman's wandering eyes taking in all of his hunter's beauty. He had to suffer it with Uriel, but he didn't have to with this interfering, infuriating human.

He grabbed his lover's head and tilted it so it would just match his perfectly. Inching his lips closer until they touched, he made sure Gertrude would know exactly who he belonged to, like the day that they first moved in.

Cas snaked his tongue in, and explored the well known and cavernous mouth of his mate. Dean moaned deep in his throat with this passionate kiss and couldn't resist pushing his muscular frame closer to the angel.

Gertrude was getting a feeling that she couldn't quite identify. It was a cross between disgust, embarrassment and arousal. She disliked homosexuality, as she was a Christian, and she silently scolded herself for the temptations of her flesh. She finally cleared her throat when she saw the two men practically dry humping in front of her.

"Ahem… I believe you have my sugar."

"Oh… of course. Sorry."

"One other question. How did you two adopt so many children within such a small time, and they all look so much like you?"

"That's… uh… family secret."

"I didn't mean to pry. Good day, gentlemen."

Practically running out the door, she bolted across the road, over her petunia plants, and entered her home. She headed to the computer and opened her Skype account. Clicking on the contact, she waited impatiently for the answer.

"You were right. There's something wrong with them. They most definitely are up to something. I saw a gun! They are not normal, and I have my suspicions about that Cas fellow. Yes. I will. Don't worry, Becky. I'll find him."

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**DUN DUN DUN! Cliffhanger moment... Couldn't resist. Any suggestions for the next chappie?**


	5. Confusion

**I thought I would give you another bubba, but the backstory was too difficult, so I just had Dean and Cas plan this one. Also, more on the Becky tangent.**

**SUPERNATURAL DOES NOT BELONG TO ME. I CANNOT CLAIM IT'S GENIUS.**

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"Deanna Mary. There. She has a normal name, unlike the others."

"I thought you liked pie?"

"I do, Cas, but you don't typically name all your kids after them."

"We are not typical people, Dean."

"When were you going to tell me this, huh Cas? I never knew we were different until today! This is shocking news…"

"I'm not sure I understand Dean. I am fairly certain that you knew that you were different from the rest of the population, and I am evidently so, as I am not human."

"I was being sarcastic, Cas."

"Oh. My apologies."

Dean chuckles at his futile attempts to help the angel understand the intricacies of human life. But, deep down, he knows that he loves Cas' little quirks. They are a part of him, and one of the reasons they got so close in the first place.

"So was all of it sarcasm? Or is the child still un-named?"

"Deanna is really named Deanna. Our grandma was awesome! I'm proud to be named after her, and so should she."

"So, how do you feel about our first planned delivery?"

"Great… Really… really great."

Cas picked up his child and lifted her into Dean's arms. She looked so small, so fragile. He pushed her dirty blonde hair away from her face, and stared into her emerald green eyes. She may appear small, but there was a fire emanating from her soul that was as strong and protective as Dean's. Deanna was perfect.

Deanna curled into her Daddy Dean, and reached for his belt, or rather, the item in his belt. She clasped her fingers around the cold metal, and yanked. Sucking on the barrel of the Colt, she seemed content.

_Just like her Daddy Dean._

Swiftly pulling the gun away from her mouth before she shot herself, Dean realised exactly what his lover had thought was true. She WAS just like him… this is not good. He ran with his newborn daughter to Sam's house. Sweating and out of breath, he knocked loudly on the front door. Gabriel answered, wearing only boxer shorts made out of sour straps.

"Dude, seriously, put some real clothes on!"

"What do you expect when you knock in the middle of kinky sex? Dress clothes? Actually, that's a good idea… SAMMY! TAKE NOTE OF THAT!"

"I didn't need to hear that… I need to speak to Sam."

"That might be a bit difficult at the moment."

"Bring. Me. Sam. Now."

Gabriel sighed. This was most unwelcomed. Oh well. Never mind. Dean will get what he wants… sort of. A click and a smoke clearance later Dean finally sees his brother… sister… brother… who's a girl…

"Hey, Dean…"

"Sammy! What the hell happened? What did you do, Gabriel?"

"I swear it wasn't me! I was just taking advantage of the situation. There must be a witch in the town; I just haven't been able to locate her."

"But my kids… they're safe, right?"

"Not if you continue letting them eat weaponry."

Dean glanced at Deanna and took the shotgun out of her mouth again. This reminded him of why he was here in the first place.

"Sammy, I wanted to get you to teach Deanna about the dangers of selling your soul and whatnot. I've noticed she has a lot of my tendencies, and I don't want her hurting herself."

"I'll see what I can do, Dean."

"Dude… that's fucked up. You need more testosterone. How long have you been like this for?"

"About 6 months."

"How did I not notice? You've been over in that time… You were most definitely male."

"Gabe used his mojo and made me look like a guy, but it only works outside the house. Inside, nothing works. Something's keeping his power at bay."

"Not that I haven't enjoyed it, Dean-o. Your brother makes a very attractive girl."

"That's another thing I don't need to know about."

"Dean, can you check something out for me?"

Dean stopped his ranting and turned to his female brother. SONOFABITCH! Those puppy eyes work even better when he's a girl… Now he has no escape from the task his brother will bestow upon him.

"Sure Sammy. What is it?"

"We had a visitor for the first time about a week before… this… Her name was Mrs. Gertrude Thripstick. Gabe's looked, but he can't see anything odd about her, so I was hoping you could see if there was anything he missed."

"I find that offensive, Samantha."

"I told you not to call me that…"

"Hey, you insult me, I do the same."

"Hold on, Sammy. Did you say Gertrude Thripstick? She came to our house too. She appeared to be snooping, and she asked a bit about you. Left in a hurry also."

"When? Dean-o, when?"

"The middle of September."

"6 months ago…"

"Go check her out, Dean. Please. Being a girl is really difficult. I bleed for a week at the end of each month… It's gross and I'm such a bitch to Gabe when it happens. Then there are the chocolate binges. They suck. I have to eat it but then I feel fat and disgusting, and I cry, but Gabe's always there for me, and then I can't stand all the crap that happens to you and to me, and your kids are so perfect and sweet, so there are times I want to kidnap them, but then I remember what Cas would do to me if I even tried, and I ramble on and on about stuff that no one needs to hear, and it's worse than anyone I've ever met. ANYONE! I hate myself like this…"

"Slow down, Sammy. We'll fix it. Gabriel, you're with me. We need to find out what Gertrude has to do with this. Sam, look after Deanna."

"Will do."

Dean handed his brother his daughter. Deanna leaned towards the broken salt line on the floor, crying and attempting to fix it. Sighing, Sam pulled a salt round out of his pocket, opened it, and poured it over the line, fixing it. Deanna cooed and then pulled a baby version of a cocky smirk. This baby was more like Dean than the Dean Shapeshifter…

_Not a memory you want to relive…_

Sam took the baby upstairs with a smile on her face.

* * *

"So where do we start, Dean-o? Her friends or her house?"

"Her house. See if she has any witchy stuff around. Damn witches… Spilling their bodily fluids everywhere… It's unsanitary."

"Yeah, Dean. We all know you hate witches… I mean, one did make you old, and this coven made you cough up your lungs, and then there was the time that…"

"SHUT UP!"

"Dad, Dean. Be quiet. We're breaking and entering."

With a click, Gabriel was inside the house.

"Or at least, YOU'RE breaking. I just enter."

"Damn Archangels…"

"What was that, Dean? I couldn't hear you over that bullshit."

"Hold on… what's that? She left her Skype account open. Where have I heard SamLicker81 before? Oh God… No…"

"What is it?"

"SamLicker81 is the account name of the webmistress of "More Than Brothers . net". In other words, Sam's fangirl is a friend of this woman, and that means Sam is about to be attacked by Becky. He's in trouble, and there's nothing we can do to save him."

"Dean chuckled. He only needed to find out how Becky was making Sam a girl, and why. This would be a piece of pie with a pissed of archangel lover wanting his Sammy back to normal. He could picture it now…"

* * *

_RETURN SAM TO NORMAL AT ONCE UNLESS YOU WANT THE WRATH OF HEAVEN UP YOUR ASS!_

_Please, Gabriel, I didn't mean to harm him._

_You made him a girl! That's worse than anything I could do, and I repeatedly killed his brother!_

_I'm sorry!_

_Take. The. Spell. Off. Now._

_Of course, Gabriel._

_That's Gabriel, Archangel of the Lord to you, Becky._

_Of course, Gabriel, Archangel of the Lord…_

* * *

This would be fun to watch.

"So where's this Becky chick?"

"Calm down, Gabriel. We just need to find a way to drag the truth out of her."

Dean's phone began to ring. He answered it with his usual gusto.

"Dean… You need to get down here, like, now!"

"Is Deanna alright? Or is she the problem?"

"She's fine, behaving human. It's not her that's the problem."

"Then what is it?"

"Dean *static* coming *static* away *static* girl *static* Becky *static*"

The dial tone sounded, and Dean ran.

* * *

**What's Becky up to? Please tell me? I have no clue! Jokes, but I will always take additional storylines into consideration...**


	6. Lotsa Love

**This is an explanation chapter. Also, I thought I'd give Cas and Dean their last kid here. Don't worry! There's still plenty to come!**

* * *

"It's okay, Sam. You and your firm body will be back to normal as soon as Gabriel dumps your girlish ass and you go out with me."

"No! How many times do I have to say that? I love Gabriel and you can't get me to leave him with witchcraft."

"Who said anything about witchcraft? When you sleep with Chuck it transfers some of his God powers to you. I am using heaven's purest form of mojo to pull this off."

"Wait? Chuck's God? How does that work?"

"You didn't know? Odd… I always thought you were the smart one."

"Just so you know, you don't want me… really. Gabe gave me genital herpes."

"I saw that ad. You looked adorable. But even if you did, I'd just cure you. It's not that hard."

"Damn Chuck… Where's Dean got to?"

* * *

"Cas! Seriously… as much as I love you, you have to let me see Sam!"

"Why, Dean? So you can fuck him like I read in your diary? I **will** make you remember who you belong to."

"Cas, come on! I don't even own a diary, and Gabriel would have smote my ass if I even tried! I. Am. Not. Sleeping. With. Sam."

"It was your diary entry, Dean. Do you need me to read it to you?"

Dean attempted to explain to the very pissed-off-and-almost-smitey angel that he was not having sex with his brother, but to no avail. Cas pinned him to the ground with his angel mojo and typed into the address bar the U.R.L. for the incriminating story.

* * *

_Dear Diary,_

_I was lying in the bedroom of our house, bored out of my mind. The kids were at preschool, and Cas was at work. I was in the stage between boredom and sleep, but I couldn't sleep, no matter how hard I tried. I remembered Sam would be alone at his place too, as Gabriel would be working on some smiting program they had upstairs. From what I gathered it was mostly "anyone who hurts my family or Sam will be smote with severe pain". He's almost as protective as I am, but anyway, as I was saying, I was so bored I thought visiting bored geek brothers would be more entertaining than staying here. Man, was I right… When I knocked on Sam's front door, all I could think about was how sexy he looked with his white shirt wrapping itself tightly around his firm muscles. His hair was damp and it looked like he had just come out of the shower a few moments before. He was stunning, almost better than Cas… I was so fucking horny that even the most uptight angel would be able to tell. I know Sam did. He looked from my eyes to the bulge in my pants and licked his lips suggestively. He pulled me inside and threw me against the wall. Sam touched, no, caressed my clavicle. I breathed out heavily. "This is wrong…" I said, despite my body's protests. Sam pushed himself flush against me. I could feel his hard prick brushing against my own. He leaned towards my ear and said to me, "Then I don't want to be right." in a husky voice. Those words went straight to my almost painfully swollen cock, and he chuckled against me, creating sweet, sweet friction. I stopped fighting and just let him claim me. Our brotherly bond became so much more. I can't believe that sexy, beautiful, talented webmistress was right when she created More Than Brothers . com. Becky, I owe you an apology. Sam and I both._

_Dean Winchester._

* * *

As Cas read, he used his mojo to strip Dean of his clothing and stretch him. Once he had finished reading, he lent over the writhing hunter who's favour he was desperate to win back.

"Tell me Dean. Tell me you're sorry."

"Cas, I swear nothing happened. It's a fake."

"You will tell me the truth."

"I am."

"Oh really?"

Cas pushed his slicked up cock into his hunter's puckered entrance. It was swift, and controlling. He would not have any of this nonsense about truth and lies. He could read Dean's soul. He could tell when he was lying, as he could now. He would get the truth, even if it meant fucking him senseless. There would be no mercy, no soothing. Just dirty and rough and an odd combination of pleasure-pain. He would win back Dean's favour, and he would have a good time doing it.

Sweat was forming on his brow as he pounded into Dean. Dean was moaning and writhing and screaming at the top of his lungs. People would hear, but he couldn't care less. He was completely at the angel's mercy. There wasn't a thing he could do to help Sam now. He was too far gone.

"Cas, baby, I'm gonna cum."

"I know Dean. Cum for me. Mark me as yours. Say my name as you reach your peak. Anything to prove you love me. Please."

"I'd do anything for you…"

Dean's scream of "Fuck, Cas!" could be heard throughout the street. He was experiencing the most powerful orgasm he could remember. Cas smirked and grunted as he came himself. He filled his hunter and finally felt at peace. He looked at Dean's soul and couldn't believe it. There was no evidence of lying on it at all. He had been telling the truth. But he had seen it. That tarnishing mark that no angel could mistake. But that would mean…

"Yes, Cas. It was an illusion. I would never cheat on you. Ever. Becky is trying to take Sam from Gabriel, and I needed to help him. She probably put a spell on you."

"No spell could touch me, Dean. Only a few things could do so, and only one to that extent. It's God, or at least some of his power."

Dean started to pull his clothing back on, but Cas just used his power to dress them, clean them up, and move them to Sam.

* * *

"You've got to realise Dean'll come for me, don't you? And even if he didn't, Gabe would. You can't keep it up forever. It'll drain your power, and no one can fool the original trickster."

"Come on, Sam. Just say yes."

"You have NO idea how much I hate that word…"

"Just let me be yours for one night."

"From Lucifer to Lilith… You aren't doing a good job at convincing me."

"Trust me, Sam."

"Now you're Ruby. You really aren't good at this, are you?"

Becky opened her mouth to speak, but what came out was not her voice. It was the voice, or rather voices, of a certain trio.

"SONOFABITCH! Cas, don't do that… It's freaky."

"Seriously, Dean-o. You wanted to get to Sammy, so my brother got you there."

"Dean, it seemed logical."

"Dean! Cas! Gabe! What took you so long?"

"Well, Sammy, Dean-o and Huggybear here were having seriously hardcore sex, and I was being fed candy by little mini Sams in togas, so you can see why we were late."

"I feel so loved."

"See! I give you the attention you deserve!"

"Becky, it's not attention I want."

"Why not?"

"Because, I'm in love with Gabriel. An archangel of the Lord, who could disassemble you with a wink and reassemble you with a smirk. He's the person I want to spend the rest of my life with, and I plan to, if he'll let me."

"Of course I'll let you, Sammy! To celebrate, we are totally doing that toga thing…"

"Oh my god… Samantha is even more prone to chick flick moments than Sam, and he was pretty prone in the first place…"

"Thanks a lot, Dean."

"Bitch…"

"Jerk…"

Becky looked from one brother to another. She couldn't keep Sam this way. It wouldn't do anything for her and it would just make him miserable. Sighing, she put up her hands and flicked them in a "Who cares?" gesture. Where there was previously a buxom young woman with jade coloured eyes and long, flowing, dark chocolate hair, there was now the tall, muscular, man whom they were accustomed to.

Without any clothes on…

"BECKY! Give me back my clothes!"

"If I can't have you, then I can at least see you once."

"Dean, I can understand why you would have been attracted to your brother… he is most impressive…"

"WHAT! Dean… You have Cas… That's just wrong…"

"IT WAS BECKY'S GODDAMN STORY! I'M NOT FUCKING ANYONE BUT CAS!"

"Gabe, can you put some clothes on me?"

"Sure Sammy!"

Gabriel clicked, and there stood a well dressed Sam, or at least, well dressed from Gabriel's point of view…

"… Not a toga, and get rid of the candy and harp…"

"The things you did with that harp, Sammy…"

"Cas… we need to leave before I gouge my eyes out…"

"I concur, Dean."

* * *

Back at Cas and Dean's house, they sat on the couch in exhaustion. It had been a busy day, and they didn't want anything more than just to curl up in each other's arms and sleep. They were just about to nod off when they heard an impatient clearing of a throat behind them.

"You two are busy. This is your seventh."

"What? When did we get this one?"

"That may have been my fault, Dean."

"You mean, this afternoon?"

"Yes."

"SONOFABITCH!"

"Don't use that language around John Samuel."

"John Samuel?"

"That IS a normal name, right?"

"… Yes, Cas."

"Sign here, initial here."

"Yeah yeah… we know the goddamn drill."

That night, Dean tossed and turned. He had 7 beautiful children sleeping downstairs, and he loved them all, but he couldn't help but think that this was too much… There didn't seem to be a way to stop it without doing something almost unspeakably horrible, but he didn't seem to have a choice. After 3 hours of thinking, he finally came to a conclusion. Waking Cas from his slumber, he spoke the dreaded words.

"Cas, we can't have sex anymore."

* * *

**Dean without sex? What's the world coming to?**


	7. Marital Problems

**Sorry this one took so long! I was having a few problems with inspiration and such. Anyways, here it it, Chapter 7!**

* * *

Dean, Sam, Cas and Gabe had been living in the town for about 3 years now. Cherry was just starting preschool, and she had all of the troublemaking support from her brothers and sisters.

"Boston… I can't sing for teacher. It hurts silly people's ears. That's what Unkie Gabe said. 'member?"

"But does that make Daddy Dean silly? It hurts his ears when we sing for him."

"It could… DADDY DEAN!"

"What is it Cher? Have you got your shoes on?"

"Ummm… maybe… Daddy Dean? Are you silly?"

"No! Who told you so?"

"Unkie Gabe said silly people get hurt when we sing."

"What! I'll ki… Uncle Sammy must get hurt when you sing… Why isn't he silly?"

"Oh… Unkie Gabe fixed Unkie Sammy. He can hear us now. He thinks we sing really pretty!"

Dean gave up at this point. He had to take his daughter to preschool, and she needed to be dressed to do that. She had decided to dress herself today, and, with her inherited angel power, she had chosen to dress herself in a white dress with a few cherries on it, for her namesake. She actually had some impressive taste for a kid her age. Dean got her white sandals on her feet after the fifth attempt, and sent her to her Daddy Cas.

"Daddy Cas! I'm all dressed up! Do I look pretty? I put some glitter on my wings!"

"Oh! That's right, your wings… Cherry, you're going to have to hide your wings at school."

"But why?"

"Because not everyone is special enough to see them. You don't want mean people to see your wings, do you?"

"I didn't think of that… Thanks Daddy Cas!"

With an intense look of concentration on her face, the white wings with red tips faded into the background, until they became invisible to the human eye. Just as that was done, Dean walked in the room. He looked between his partner and daughter, and smiled.

"Cherry, sweetheart, we have to go now. Are you excited?"

"Yup! What do I do if the kids are mean to me? Sour Cream said I should turn them into baseballs and throw them at the wall… but I was just going to turn their food into frogs. Which one do you like?"

"Neither, Cherry. Just tell the teacher. She'll fix it."

"Are you sure? What will she do?"

"She'll make them say sorry, and she'll try and make you friends."

"But what if I don't want to be friends with them?"

"Come on Cherry, we'll be late. Say goodbye to your brothers and sisters."

Cherry turned to her 6 siblings.

_Boston is complaining because he isn't old enough to go with me. _

_Apple is flipping through a lore book and writing down an incantation for me that will help me learn faster. _

_Sour Cream is making small cuts in the legs of Unkie Gabe's favourite chair, just waiting to be sat on and broken. _

_Reese is eating a leftover double-bacon-cheeseburger. _

_Deanna is pulling apart a shotgun._

_John is playing with the computer keyboard._

Cherry loved her family, and she would teach them all she learnt at preschool after she came home.

"Goodbye, guys! I'll be back soon!"

Cherry stepped into the Impala, and waited patiently for her Daddy Dean to strap her in. She would be the best kid in the entire preschool. She'd be perfect! She noticed her Daddy Dean's posture change slightly, and she knew her Uncle Gabe had arrived slightly late to say good luck and such things. She listened carefully for the sounds that she knew she would hear. She wasn't disappointed. She heard the crack of wood snapping, and she heard the surprised squeal of a certain archangel, and she could picture Sour Cream's innocent look as she sharpened the metal edges of her own wings. Cherry smiled. Today would be a good day.

* * *

Dean had taken Cherry to preschool, and he just wanted to curl up and go to sleep. He opened the door and went to sit down on the couch, except it was covered in people drinking beer. HIS. BEER. They were everywhere… And Cas, HIS CASTIEL was wearing an apron and serving them. Ok, the apron was sexy, but it was for HIS eyes only. What were these vultures doing in HIS house?

And why was he suddenly all possessive?

Dean walked up to Cas and very deliberately wrapped his arms around his lover. After stealing a kiss from those slightly chapped, rose coloured lips, he growled low in the angel's ear.

"Who are these people, Castiel, and what are they doing here?"

Cas shivered. It was rare for Dean to use his full name, and when he did, it either had him terrified or begging for more. This was a time for the latter.

"This… This is a housewarming party. It is commonly used to introduce yourself to the neighbours and make friends and connections… Usually it is done much earlier on, but we were… busy…"

"Were we? And where are the children?"

"At… at Bobby's. He and Crowley said they could look after them."

"It's an interesting idea, Castiel. Are you going to introduce me to the neighbours you have met?"

"Of course, Dean."

"Before you do that, pretty, take the apron off, or else we'll have our eighth child sooner than we both expected."

Cas' pupils widened. He hadn't had sex with this beautiful man in almost 2 years. The taunt of it was almost too much to bear. They had released some sexual tension with blowjobs and handjobs, with the occasional grinding, but it was excruciating. He had almost forgotten what it felt like to have his mate's dick inside his tight entrance. He slowly removed the apron, tried to calm himself down with thoughts of Zachariah, and walked dazedly towards the masses of people in their living room.

"Uh, Dean, this is Mark, and that's Jude, and over there is Hugo and his brother Malachi."

"Nice to meet you. How's things?"

And with that simple sentence Cas knew that the moment was over. It made him feel excruciatingly depressed. So he headed towards the fridge while his hunter exchanged small-talk with the neighbours and pulled out the mincemeat.

* * *

"I was only painting like Unkie Sammy taught me! I wasn't being naughty!"

"We do not tolerate…painting demonic symbols in blood… You will be sent home at this rate!"

"Why? Is it in the rules that you can't paint with blood?"

"Well… No… but…"

"If I'm not breaking any rules then how is it naughty?"

"You just are! No more blood!"

"You forgot to say please!"

"What?"

"Good manners get you far in life. That's what Unkie Gabe says!"

"But…"

"Ask me nicely and maybe I'll stop painting with blood."

"Seriously?"

"I'm waiting."

"PLEASE stop painting with blood!"

"Of course, Miss Glade. Since you said please, I will."

* * *

"Umm… Dean?"

"What's up, Jude?"

"Why is Cas eating raw mince?"

"He's wha..? Um... He has a disease... and it requires him to eat raw meat every few days… I... uh... guess he forgot that today was the day… Excuse me…"

Dean strode over to the angel, who was unceremoniously gorging himself on the raw meat.

"Cas! What's wrong with you?"

"Can't talk. Eating."

"Don't give me that! Why are you eating raw red meat?"

"Cause this makes me very happy."

"We have guests! You can't eat raw meat in front of them; actually, you just can't eat raw meat!"

"Why Dean? Are you going to cut steaks out of our lives too?"

"What?"

"You know what? I think we need to see a counsellor to get ourselves on the right track! It's not healthy for the children!"

"When were we talking about the kids? And shrinks!"

"I'll book us in. Don't worry, Dean! We'll soon be functioning perfectly as a family again! Leave it to me."

"Huh? Cas, you lost me…"

Cas turned towards the onlooking neighbours.

"Well! What are you lot doing here? You had the housewarming, we all know each other, and you can all GO HOME!"

The neighbours left the house somewhat uncertainly. This was probably the oddest party any of them had been to. This would definitely go on facebook. After everyone had gone, Cas walked towards the phone. He dialled the number, and started speaking.

"Hello, I'd like to book an appointment for tomorrow morning with Dr. Goodman. Yes, 9:30's fine. Fantastic, see you there."

"9:30? Seriously, Cas?"

"I thought our relationship was more important than your sleep. Was I incorrect, Dean?"

"Uh… Is that a trick question?"

"I suspected as much. Goodnight Dean."

"It's 2 in the afternoon!"

"GOODNIGHT DEAN!"

Cas flew up the stairs in a rage, leaving a very confused Dean downstairs, holding a pillow and blanket in his arms.

* * *

**You should never underestimate a depressed, meat eating, child loving, nerd angel. They will make you sleep on the couch.**


	8. Counselling and Rattlesnakes

**Sorry it took me a while, but here you go.**

* * *

Click. Click. Click. Click. Click. Click. Click. Click. Click.

Tick-Tock-Tick-Tock-Tick-Tock-Tick-Tock.

Scritch-Scratch.

Tap. Tap.

Scribble.

Clack.

"STOP!"

Dean breathed in deeply. He didn't give a flying fuck about what these people thought of him. This argument with Cas hadn't blown over as fast as he expected it to, and the waiting room was just filled with _**noise**_. Clicking pens, ticking clocks, people who scratched as if they had fleas, tapping fingers, scribbling on forms, clacking of keyboards, it was just too much.

He didn't mean to upset the angel, but ever since Sam and he had taken care of that wraith in the wacky shack, he had been overly suspicious of anything to do with the mind. He didn't want to experience craziness again. It was not cool. Definitely not cool. He hated shrinks.

"Castiel and Dean Winchester? Dr. Murphy will see you now."

"Come on, Dean."

_Ok… I thought waiting rooms were bad. I had no idea about the actual office! What is he trying to do? Make people uncomfortable deliberately? That desk makes me nervous… I mean, it's looming over me, with its silver legs and glass top, and you know what? That guy reminds me of a mini Zachariah. Do I have stage 4 stomach cancer? No… I think I'm fine for the moment… Calm. Down. Deep. Breaths._

"Dean."

"IT WASN'T ME!"

"Excuse me?"

"I mean… Continue, please, Doctor."

"Dean, I was going to ask you how you and Castiel here met."

"Umm, well, we met when I was… umm… stuck in a… well…"

"Dean was in Hell. I freed him."

"Cas!"

"I do have a full name, you know, Dean."

"What kind of hell were you in, Dean? Drugs? Alcohol?"

"No, you misunderstood me, Dr. Murphy. Dean was in Hell, literally. I gripped him tight and raised him from perdition. Now he bears my mark and our children."

"Castiel, how do you claim to do all this?"

"I am an Angel of the Lord. I am virtually undefeatable when I am at full strength."

"Dean, how long has Castiel been having these delusions?"

"Umm…"

"Must I prove myself?"

"Cas! You can't do anything here. He's human… You have to be careful what you say to him."

"Dean, if we want to solve our issues we must be honest. Counselling will not work if we lie constantly."

Dr. Murphy was very confused by now. One delusional patient, he could cope with, but TWO delusional and homosexual patients was just insane.

"Um… What kind of mark do you have, Dean? A love bite?"

Cas shook his head. How on earth did this 'doctor' earn his degree? It seemed preposterous. He was not listening to a word that they were saying. Raising his hand slightly, he flexed the muscles and snapped them into a fist. Where Dean's shirt had been previously, there was now a mere gathering of ashes on his partner's jeans. Taken once again by Dean's beauty, he stared adoringly at the hunter's well-kept muscle and golden, freckled skin. Composing himself, he gestured to the red handprint on his left shoulder.

"That is the mark I left. Not only imprinted on his skin, but his soul."

"But… uh… Dean… your shirt spontaneously combusted…"

"Nice going, genius. Now everyone in the town will know about you and your mojo."

"Dean. You should show me some respect. I show you more than is required of me."

Dr. Murphy stared between the two men. He slowly realised everything that he had told himself belonged in the realm of fiction and all that he had assured people was reality could basically be thrown out the door. Breathing deeply, he gathered his thoughts and faced the arguing couple.

"Quiet. Down. Now. Look, considering the conversation and the irregularity of the circumstances, I will assist you as best as I can, but you need to be completely honest with me, and allow me to have brief insight into your races and lives. Is that alright with you?"

"Of course, Dr. Murphy. Dean will also oblige if he wants to sleep in a bed tonight."

Dean shot a quick glare at the other man, before complying and muttering under his breath a single word. He was evidently out of his element.

"Fine…"

"Ok, Castiel. You are an Angel, am I correct?"

"Yes."

"Dean, what are you?"

"100% human."

"You seem incredibly comfortable in the paranormal realm. Why is that?"

"I was raised to fight monsters and demons since I was 4."

"And you were sent to hell?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"I sold my soul."

"For what?"

"My brother's life."

"Castiel. Being an angel, are you unable to fornicate?"

"Not at all. I enjoyed my experiences with Dean in the past, and they have created the most beautiful children in the world."

"So you have children who are genetically related to you?"

"Yes."

"How was that possible?"

"Angel births happen because of storks. Humans and other mammals experience pregnancy, but with most supernatural creatures this is not so. Back when angels could comfortably share the earth with humanity, humans saw the storks often, so that is how the fable of the stork bringing human children happened."

They talked like this for the duration of their time in the office. Short, simple questions with equally short, simple answers.

As their session closed, Dr. Murphy had reached 3 conclusions.

1: Dean and Castiel would always have a fairly unstable relationship.

2: They needed some form of physical stimulation to even out the instability.

3: He needed a vacation.

* * *

"So. Who's gonna go first? You or me?"

"I suggest you go first. I may need to think further for a creative idea."

"Ok."

"Dean, wait! Aren't you going to tell me what your plans are?"

Dean waltzed towards the angel. Leaning towards his ear, he gently whispered to Cas, his breath caressing the channels of his lover's inner ear.

"Hon, part of the fun is the surprise."

* * *

"UNKIE SAMMY!"

"What! Sour-Cream, what is it?"

"There's a problem with that couch."

"How?"

"Just sit down on it and see. It makes a weird noise."

"Ummm… ok."

"Listen! There it is!"

"Yeah… What is that? Wait… I recognise it now…THAT'S A RATTLESNAKE!"

"Herbert! That's where you got to. You've been a very bad boy. Go back in your cage. Thanks, Unkie Sammy!"

* * *

**Uh... I think I have brain damage... Or insomnia. **

**BTW: Can anyone guess where I got Dr. Murphy's name from?**


	9. I Want A Pet Too

**Merry Christmas, people! Hope this will suffice...**

* * *

Dean sucked in a breath, preparing himself for the worst. He opened the door of his house and squeezed his eyes shut as he was attacked by 7 small battering rams of angel mojo.

"DADDY DEAN!"

"Hey, kids! Sam."

"Uh… Dean. I need to talk to you about something."

"Sure, Sammy. Guys, go play with Daddy Cas."

"Okie, Daddy Dean!"

Dean smiled as he saw his children part run, part fly into his partner's arms, slightly knocking him off balance. He had high hopes for tonight. The counsellor had suggested date nights, because, in all honesty, an apocalypse is not the best way to start off a relationship, and they hadn't had much time to get to know each other. In fact, the first time they slept together, they were in an argument.

* * *

_**FLASHBACK**_

"_Dean. No. This idea of yours, it's ridiculous."_

"_Come on, Cas! We only shot one HUMAN-MADE bullet into the bastard. If we dosed ten bullets with a little angel mojo and Enochian magic, then we'd be set! I mean, the Colt did hurt him, and that was without our resident angel's help. Add Gabriel to the equation, and as much as I hate the prick for killing me and scarring Sammy for life, he'd be useful. I'm sure he'd love to help out!"_

"_You obviously were not paying attention to him the last time we met. He clearly stated that he wanted no part of Michael and Lucifer's battle. You will not convince him otherwise."_

"_We don't need to convince him to help kill Lucifer, just to add a little extra oomph to The Colt! With his archangel powers, we'd be able to kill the son-of-a-bitch without any problem."_

"_It will not work."_

"_Yes it will."_

"_No, it won't."_

"_Yes. It. Will."_

"_Have you been drinking, Dean?"_

"_Have YOU been drinking, Cas?"_

"_I assume that means, 'Yes, Cas. I have in fact consumed a large amount of alcohol and I am presently unable to conduct myself in a reasonable or acceptable manner, so yes, I shall presently forget all that I have said and done tonight and let Cas take me to bed.' Am I correct, Dean?"_

"_Cas, you kinky son-of-a-bitch! You want to take me to bed, do you?"_

"_I suppose this has some form of a sexual reference."_

"_You bet it does, Huggybear."_

_**END OF FLASHBACK

* * *

**_

At any rate, Dean reasoned to himself, date nights should be fun. One night we do what I want to do, and the next night is Cas' turn.

"Dean, I wanted to talk to you."

"Oh, right Sammy. Sorry. What is it?"

"Uh… Did you know that Sour Cream has a pet rattlesnake named Herbert?"

"A pet rattlesnake? What! How did you find out about this?"

"Well… that's not important at the moment. The fact is that you have a rattlesnake in your house, near your children, that is very much alive and kicking."

"Sammy, thanks for telling me, and thanks also for looking after the kids. It was a huge help."

"No problem, Dean. See you later."

"Bye."

Dean waved goodbye to his sasquatchian brother, then turned towards the mass of bodies that was his partner and children.

"SOUR CREAM RAISIN! Come here for a moment."

"What is it, Daddy Dean?"

"Who is Herbert?"

Sour Cream shrunk slightly, and smiled with mock innocence at her human father. He, in return, gave her a pressing, stern look of impatience.

"Well, sweetie?"

"He… He's my pet."

"What kind of pet?"

"A good one."

"What type of animal, Sour Cream?"

"He's not an animal, Apple told me so."

"Then what type of beast is he?"

"Reptilian."

"What kind of reptile?"

"A snake."

"What type of snake?"

"A rattlesnake."

"Do you think a young girl should keep a dangerous reptile as a pet?"

"I'M NOT A YOUNG GIRL! I'm an angel! I can have whatever pets I want!"

At the word 'pets' the rest of the children perked up, then materialized in front of their more masculine father.

"Does Sour Cream have a pet?"

"Why don't we get pets?"

"I want a pet too!"

Cherry stood up straight, and pulled a look of intense concentration. Shortly afterwards, a small pigeon appeared on her arm.

"YAY! I have a pet too! I'll name you Blueberry!"

"I want a pigeon too!"

"Shut up, Boston! You couldn't make a pigeon; you'd probably kill it if you tried!"

"I'll show you, Sour Cream! I can do anything I want!"

Boston's face contorted and within moments, a small creature was snuffling at his leg.

"I DIDN'T WANT A PIG!"

"At least you didn't kill it…"

"I can't send it back…"

"Ha-ha! You're stuck with him!"

"What are you going to name him, Bos?"

"Hmm… I'LL NAME HIM RUDOLPH!"

"… Why?"

"… I like Rudolph. His nose is red…"

"MY TURN!"

"What do you want, Reese? A pigeon? Pig?"

"I want a turtle!"

"Umm… okie."

"Isn't he cute! I'll name him Fatcakes!"

"Again… Why?"

"Fatcakes are yummy…"

"I think I would like a pet too. Something intelligent. A dolphin!"

"Apple. We can't keep a dolphin."

"I have been studying the notebooks that Unkie Gabe gave to me, and I am certain that I could pull up the necessary equipment as well."

Apple, being further along in her studies, simply waved her hand a little, and in the direction she waved, there was a fully equipped dolphin tank, with a dolphin inside.

"I'll name you after your scientific name. Delphinidae Delphis. Or Delphis for short."

"Apple… you're such a geek."

"Being a geek reduces your headaches when you, as Daddy Dean calls it, mojo something into thin air."

"You guys are looking in completely wrong directions. I already have a pet, and he's on this monitor."

"Reese… that's a pixelated purple puppy."

"His name's Puppinator 2000. He doesn't need to eat, sleep, poop or anything! I have the best pet in the world!"

"Reese, my boy, I highly doubt that."

"GRANDPA CROWLEY!"

"I have a present for our little Deanna. Seeing as she is very much like her Daddy Dean, I figured I would get her a pet that would be just as fitting."

Crowley smirked as he saw Dean tense up as he heard that familiar growl that could only mean one thing.

"Grandpa Crowley, is that a hellhound? Cause he looks adorable!"

"Yes, Deanna, dear. His name's Abyss. Do you think you can take good care of him?"

"Always! Grandpa Crowley? Is he all mine?"

"Yes. As everyone else has their own pets, I think that Abyss can be yours alone."

"YAY! Daddy Dean, look!"

"He's human, sweetie, remember? He can't see him."

"Oh… I forgot."

Dean was beginning to hyperventilate. This was not what he had intended to do when he pulled Sour Cream aside about Herbert. Now not only did he have to deal with a rattlesnake, but a turtle, dolphin, pigeon, pig, and a hellhound. This was not good.

"Oh, come on Daddy Dean! See, he likes you!"

* * *

**Like it? Hate it? Want me to do something completely different? Let me know!**


	10. Who Can Babysit?

**I am so sorry! I can't believe I haven't uploaded in so long! Expect a few chapters in the next few days, though, as I have been re-inspired! Also, this chapter is a bit more of a setup for things to come, and in that case, is unfortunately a bit more bland than what I'd like.**

* * *

"Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Crap. Fuck. Shit."

Dean was pacing around the living room, trying to think of a first date that would astound his lover. His problem, however, was that Cas was an angel. No matter what he did, it would always be inadequate.

"Dean, is everything alright? I don't want you swearing in front of the children."

"Yes, Cas! I just, um, totally forgot about Sam's, um, dry-cleaning!"

"Do I look like an idiot, Dean?"

"No... You look like the sexy man who has saved my life multiple times now. Is that better than swearing, my dear?"

Cas just sighed, and walked back upstairs, yelling as he ascended.

"Don't forget to ask your brother to mind the kids tonight!"

Oh! Yes! Sam might have ideas, too! Dean practically bolted out the door towards his brother's place. He rounded the corner, and ran straight into Mrs. Gertrude Thripstick.

"What on earth are you doing! Running around like a maniac!"

"I'm sorry, Mrs. Thripsti-"

"Nonsense! Call me Gertrude, or Gertie, if you like!"

"I'm sorry, Gertrude."

"Alright. Now, where are you off to in such a rush?"

"Do I really have to answer you right now? We can talk later, but, as you said, I'm in a rush."

"Oh, so that's how it is! Nearly kill me with your gallivanting about, and then refuse to talk to me!"

"Ok! Ok! I'm sorry. I'm off to my brother's place."

"Sam?"

"Yes. Sam. Can I go now?"

"Why are you going over there?"

"Jesus!"

"Do not take the Lord's name in vain! I may have to put up with you and your... partner's... lifestyle, but I can at least correct you on that!"

"Look, I really need to go. I promise I will talk to you later, if you want, but I need to go now!"

"Fine! But I must insist you come over with your beautiful children sometime this week!"

"Ok! Gotta go!"

Dean took off running halfway through his sentence. Mrs. Thripstick had always been a bit odd, but it was unusual for her to make his hunters sense to go off. Oh well. It could be expected, seeing as she had helped Becky that one time.

Finally he arrived at Sam's door. Rapping sharply on the wooden frame, he shifted impatiently, waiting for his gargantuan brother to answer the door.

"Hello? Oh, hi Dean." a sleepy Sam muttered out. "What'cha doing here?"

"Dude, why are you so tired? It's 2:00 PM?"

"I've been feeling a little sick lately."

"Damn! I was wondering if you could babysit the kids for me tonight, but I guess not."

"Yeah, sorry."

"I'm almost afraid to ask, but do you think Gabe could?"

"No, he's been called away on 'urgent business' for heaven. Said it couldn't wait."

"Anyone else? I really need the kids off my hands..."

"Well, why not ask one of the other neighbours? It seems like they all want to figure out what the hell is up with you lot, and it would be a perfect opportunity."

"Half-breed angel-human babies with superior intellect born to a handsome gay couple, being minded by simple-minded civilians that scream if something even slightly unordinary happens... How do you think that would go down?"

"If I was able to, I would babysit, but I can't. Don't make me feel worse."

"Alright, one last question... What should I do for Cas' first date?"

"Let him do something, I don't know... human. Let him get to experience the 'freedom' he envies of us. Just a typical, adequate date would astonish him."

"Dude, that's amazing! Why didn't I think of that?"

"Because you're a bitch. Now I'm going back to sleep. Bye, Dean."

The door was slammed in his face, but he didn't mind. He had his plan figured out: the typical college date, (dinner, movie, drive and make-out) but with some twists of class. Like a live performance instead of a movie, and a nice hotel instead of a romp in the Impala. He was actually surprised at how simple it was. His only problem now, was the kids. If I can't get Sam or Gabe to babysit, and Crowley and Bobby are looking into a hunt, then I guess I am stuck with the neighbours. I could always take them to Gertrude, I'm sure she wouldn't mind...

"Why, of course I'll look after the little tykes! Why on earth didn't you ask me before?"

Dean had to bite his tongue to stop himself from blurting out all the reasons why she was his last resort.

"I guess I was just too caught up in my thoughts to ask you at the time."

"Ah, yes, well. I'm sure it won't happen again. Just drop them off when you're about to head off. See you soon!"

Walking towards the Impala, he felt his hunter's gut twist again, but again, just brushed it off. He drove off to the theatre nearby, and saw that they were currently performing 'The Taming of the Shrew'. He paid for the tickets, and booked a luxurious suite at the hotel a few blocks away from the theatre. Add reservations to a restaurant nearby, and his date was all set up.

He drove back to his home, and was greeted by 7 whirring balls of energy.

"Daddy Dean! Reese ate my cupcake!"

"Apple broke my computer!"

"Sour Cream set me on fire!"

Sighing, Dean stepped into the house, to see Cas standing in a circle of holy fire.

"Hello, Dean."

"Cas?"

"The children got a bit... restless."

"KIDS!"

The raucous group immediately fell silent, and the quivering group shoved their elder sister forward, to brave their father.

"Umm... Well... You see, Daddy Dean... There was a... um... BIG DEMON! And... he came into the house and cursed us! This particular curse made us completely different to how we would normally be, and that's how Daddy Cas got stuck in the holy fire circle!"

His children nodded excessively as Cherry told this story, and Dean couldn't help but remember when he would try to pull off lies similar to this with his father. He smirked at his offspring, and flipped a switch. Immediately, the house was bathed in fluorescent light, and the invisible demon wards flared up, obviously unharmed.

"If it was a demon, then how did he get past these? Hmm?"

"Umm... Heh..."

"Cherry? Will you tell me the truth?"

Cherry looked at her father, and her... other father still trapped in the flames. Seeing Daddy Dean's vibrant green eyes staring at her, a warning written into them. Clearing her throat, she looked once more, nervously, into the green orbs. She fidgeted and finally spoke.

"Okie. We found Unkie Gabe's secret candy stash."

"And?"

"And we ate it!" replied a slightly irritated Cherry. It wasn't that hard to figure out what happened.

"Ok. Well, I want you all to clean up this mess. Cas and I have to go out tonight, so you will be staying with Mrs. Thripstick for the night."

As his kids walked off to clean up the mess, Dean strode over to his lover. He grabbed a vase from a shelf nearby and threw its contents onto the fire.

"Thankyou."

"No problem."

"Dean?"

"Yes?"

"I missed you."

* * *

**Like I said, more of a setup than anything important really happening, but I promise you, it's coming!**


	11. Date Night

**Ok, I'm going to stick a warning here, because this is labelled as Humor/Romance. Now, in this part, there is some blood, and death, which rarely fits into either category. If you don't want to read it, then you can skip this chapter, but it's only mentioned at the end, if you do want to brave it.**

**Ok, so yes, warning done. I told you I am working towards something, and I hope to get there as soon as possible, because I am losing my drive for this story. I do want to finish it, though, and start on a new one. So expect it to be wrapping up soon.**

**AzarathianSorceror**

* * *

Dean and I are sitting at a particularly nice restaurant, discussing all the little things that we love about each other, just like the doctor told us to, and I don't think I have ever felt so shy in my life.

It might have something to do with the things that Dean likes about me... that he is muttering in my ear, with that smirk of his...

"You know what else I love about you, Castiel?"

He practically growled that one out...

"Nn..no?"

I'm shivering. My cheeks are flushed and I already have to hide my slight erection. How can he be so competent at getting me this worked up?

"I love how your hips do that little roll against mine when you are riding on my hard cock. Mmm... It feels so good, Cas. You know what I mean, right? That _**small**_ twist."

Biting my lip, I nod, and acknowledge him and his filthy words. But apparently, that's not enough for my partner, and he gently bites down on my earlobe, and voices his discontent.

"No, Castiel. I want to hear you say it. Answer me properly."

My blue eyes are nearly black. Ashamed, I turn to Dean, and see that he is in a similar state to me, with his vibrant green eyes a deep shade of emerald, and as lust-blown as mine. I'm not as embarrassed as I was before, but despite the convenient location of our table, I can feel the stare of others. It's not pleasant.

"Dean, we are attracting attention."

"What more do you expect, Cas? A blind man would stare seeing you this flustered."

"I... I cannot help it."

"I know."

"Can we leave now?"

"As soon as you do one little thing for me."

"What."

"Say it."

* * *

"Now kids, did your father... er... fathers... um... parents let you know what would be happening?"

"Yes, Mrs. Thripstick."

"You're a good girl, Cherry. Now, I'm going to go get you lot some snacks. Be back in a tick!"

Mrs. Thripstick walked out of the room, and as soon as she was out of sight, the children began their inspection of the house.

"Where are all the anti-possession artefacts?"

"I can't find the salt lines!"

"Hey, guys! I found a crucifix!"

"Boston, they're practically useless."

"Have you been reading those silly vampire books that the school has?"

"... Maybe."

"Guys, shhh. She's coming back."

Mrs Thripstick waltzed back into the room, and saw 7 adorable children sitting on her carpet, smiling up at her expectantly.

"Aww. You're all such well behaved children."

"Thankyou, Mrs. Thripstick."

"Here's your dinner, kids."

"Do you have any salt, Mrs Thripstick?"

"I'm sorry, of course I do, Sour Cream."

Their babysitter ran back to the kitchen and returned with a large salt shaker.

"Here you go, sweetheart."

"Thankyou, Mrs. Thripstick."

Sour Cream promptly stood up, salt shaker in hand, walked towards the main entrance, and lay down a perfectly executed salt line, at least... she did. However, Mrs. Gertrude Thripstick ran forward, and snatched the salt shaker away from the dark haired child.

"NO. We do NOT put food on the carpet."

"Technically," chimed Apple from the other room, "salt is a condiment."

A stern glare in Apple's direction silenced the child, and Gertrude put her attention back on the felon in front of her.

"Apologise."

"Why?"

"Because, you misbehaved and ruined my carpet."

"It's hardly ruined."

"Don't get smart with me, young lady!"

"But I am trying to save your life!"

"By spilling salt on the floor?"

"No, by... What was it Apple?"

"By spreading a purifying agent around the perimeter of the house, the purity of salt counteracts the impurity of the mutated demon soul, thus repelling it."

"... Yeah... What she said."

"That's it! You are both going to the naughty corner until you learn how to behave!"

Gripping both hands of the offensive children, she placed them at the opposite ends of the house.

"Umm, Mrs. Thripstick?"

"What, Apple!"

"Technically, it would have been corners. Not corner. Going to the naughty corners."

Mrs. Thripstick stared exasperatedly at the child, before walking away.

"Nobody appreciates intelligence."

* * *

"Dean, why is he treating her like that? It hardly seems like the correct way to build up a relationship..."

"Well, Cas. She won't behave for him if he treats her decently, and he will lose respect if his girl walks around cussing at all his friends."

"So he humiliates her, and makes her think he's mad?"

"Don't worry, Cas. It's Shakespeare. I don't think _**he**_ even knew what he was writing half the time..."

* * *

"Can I have 5ths?"

"Reese! You've eaten far too much for a child your age anyway! No!"

Gertrude Thripstick took the child's plate and went to put it on the sink when she saw Deanna, sitting next to her knife stand.

"Your knives are blunt. I could sharpen them, for a price, of course!"

"Deanna! Put those down! You'll cut yourself!"

Deanna rolled her eyes, put the knife she was holding back in its slot in the stand, before holding her hands up in a mock surrender. Gertrude pulled the Deanna off of the kitchen bench, and walked to the TV, hoping that would amuse the children. She went to turn it on, when she saw a big flash from the end of her room. She ran towards there to see what happened, to see a very satisfied John, dusting his hands.

"Look what I did, Mrs. Thripstick! I fixed your computer! It works almost 5 times faster now!"

"John! Get away from those electrical wires! Oh my goodness!"

As she was about to begin a long tirade at the youngest child about electrical hazards, she felt a tugging on her skirt.

"Why won't you yell at me? I'm just as good at being bad as Sour Cream! You aren't paying attention to me!"

"Go do something else, Boston! You're in my way!"

Boston sniffled, and walked away, before turning around and saying in a melancholy voice, "By the way, Sour Cream's got your salt shaker again..." Mrs. Thripstick ran towards her living room, and noticed that the entire edge of her living room was an edge thick with salt. She opened her mouth to chastise the mischievous child. Before she could begin, however, Sour Cream interjected.

"You don't want to die, do you? Well, I'm salting your house anyway! You need it!"

"Put that salt shaker down this instant, or else I will call your father!"

"Which one?"

Sour Cream smirked at the face that her babysitter was making, before continuing her salt line. Mrs. Thripstick marched towards the phone, when she was stopped by the little short know-it-all.

"All your information is wrong, Mrs. Thripstick. I have studied extensively and have found no mention anywhere of a real 'Hogwarts School of Wizardry'. It is just a fantasy."

"How did you find that! I had that hidden! Put it back, Apple!"

Mrs. Thripstick snatched the book from the child, and ran to return it to her hiding spot. She couldn't let her church find out she was reading this, or else she would be in huge trouble. She took a deep breath, and heard Cherry's voice from the other room.

"Guys! Unkie Gabe says to stop being so difficult."

"That doesn't sound like him, Cherry."

"Your right, Sour Cream, it doesn't. I'll just check."

"He says Unkie Sammy told him to say it."

"Ahh."

She had had it. No more nonsense. She marched through the corridor and voiced her exasperation.

"WILL ALL OF YOU **STOP**!"

There was silence. She was so relieved that she began to laugh hysterically. The kids watched in amazement.

"Do you think we made her mad, Cherry?"

* * *

"Where are we headed now, Dean?"

"To a hotel."

"Why?"

Dean pulls out a box of condoms, and gestures to the duffle bag filled with various other sex toys.

"You mean, we are going to copulate?"

"Yes, Cas."

"That seems like a fitting end to such a fantastic date."

"Fantastic, huh?"

"Well, the food was delicious, the play had an intriguing twist to it, and now I am about to have sex with the man that I fell in love with the moment I touched the first atom of his existence."

"Wow. All the way back then?"

"Yes."

"Wow."

* * *

"You will remain seated in your designated corner until I permit you to leave! Is that understood!"

"No."

"Boston! She says stay on your chair until she says get up!"

"I knew that, Sour Cream!"

"No you didn't!"

"Yes I did!"

"Didn't!"

"Did!"

"Not!"

"QUIET!"

Mrs. Thripstick left the room, and went to debrief the other kids.

"Did."

* * *

"Ngngngg! Dean! Right there!"

"You like it when I do that, Castiel?"

"Yes, oh, Father, yes!"

Dean chuckled.

"Do you really want to bring your father into this?"

The vibrating cock ring was on Castiel's member, and Dean was working his hole with his tongue. The dual sensations were almost too much for the angel. He could feel himself getting looser and looser as his partner continued his ministrations, and he was writhing and twisting and contorting in a vain attempt to further his pleasure.

"Alright Cas, think your ready?"

"Dean! Just flip me over and fuck me!"

"Your wish is my command." Dean replied with a smirk.

He pushed his hard and leaking member into his angel's awaiting hole. Hissing as he felt the walls constrict around him.

"Cas, baby, relax."

Visibly loosening his tightened stance, he breathed deeply, and whispered into his hunter's ear "Move."

Dean moved. He slowly pushed himself in and out of his partner, letting him adjust, before picking up the pace.

In. Out. In. Out.

They were sweating, reaching their peak. Dean was moving faster now, mentally hoping Cas would get his release so he could cum.

"Dean, I think I'm nearly there... just a few more... and..."

"Daddy Dean?"

Dean was shocked. He grabbed the sheets of the hotel room bed and quickly covered himself and his slightly disappointed angel.

"Boston! Ahh!"

"Daddy Dean? Why are you wrestling with Daddy Cas?"

"Boston, go back to Mrs. Thripstick. She'll be worried sick."

"But she's mad."

"Dean, what's the matter anyway? Don't you want our son to see the close bond we have?"

"Dude... That's just... Sick! Would you want to see your father... um... making humans?"

"I watched all the time."

"Ok, wrong analogy..."

"Boston, Daddy Dean is right. Mrs. Thripstick will be worried about you. She is only human, after all."

"Why are you here anyway?"

"Sour Cream was being mean to me."

"Go back. We will deal with this tomorrow."

"Okie."

A moment later, Boston was gone.

"Now, where were we?"

* * *

"Cherry? Apple?"

There was no answer. The lights were flickering, and Sour Cream's salt lines had been broken. Vacuumed up.

"Guys? Where are you?"

The clink of metal on tiles. Someone was in the kitchen. Boson cautiously toddled towards the sound, and its destination.

"Seriously guys. This isn't funny."

He walked in, and saw a few spots of blood. Now he was really scared. He followed the blood spots, and saw Mrs. Thripstick's dead body. a few drops of blood coming from her mouth, and her eyes frozen open in a mixture of shock and horror.

"CHERRY!"

Next thing Boston knew, he was inside a metal cage, with his siblings, in a ring of holy fire staring down a small group of demons.

* * *

**Let me know what you think. Was it too much? Should I tame it down?**


End file.
